Completely mindless rant from former world traveller now provincial dweller

Monday, July 30, 2007

Fields Anew

Well I am in the new house. And it is pretty good too I must say.

My David chose it, and just as with all the things he is choosing recently - I couldn't have done better myself.

It is very Bachelorette Pad and big enough to have rowdy dinner parties, but small enough to heat with just one gas heater.

Which is very good. It is a hop step and a jump to a very cool deli, and a bottle shop (which should make those dinner parties easier to have). It has a big lawn which I do not have to mow - which is shaded by these very large jacaranda trees from the lot over the back.

Toowoomba is a strange town - I mean strangely laid out - the houses are late 19th Century and all on half acre blocks - and then there is one great big whopping block that kind of goes right down the middle behind all the houses.

They usually have a tennis court or something on them, and really big old trees - kind of like a hidden forest.

I would have loved to lived in a big old Queenslander on one of those blocks as a child - and hidden myself away in the heat of the summer under a tree reading Enid Blyton or Ruth Parks and imagining myself to be thousands of miles away and hundreds of years ago.

So I will be able to sit by the old paling fence and pretend anyway, this summer.

How delicious!

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Didn't we have a loverly time the day we moved

Moving day


AGAIN.

I swear to god, I am just going to buy a campervan and be done with it.

Moving sucks something that is not very nice to suck at all.

Like the end of a vaccuum cleaner.

or a bag full of air and pepper.

or the end of a 5v battery........

No sympathy needed. I have hired a ute this time, and bought reuseable plastic containers. So next time I will be ready.

Oh dear God - next time!

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

We are the Angry Mob






Hello Lovelies,










Nearly Splendour time.........................










I am REALLY looking forward to Kaiser Chiefs.










Their music is smart and clever and makes my life better.










Sounds like the perfect friend/lover/political representative










That sounds like a good case for genetic engineering - take one Kaiser Chiefs album, add hydrocarbons and a large energy source, then Voila!!!










Something else that made me laugh out loud but I am not sure if it improved my life was - THIS - Victoria Beckham in all her glory....................










I know I know, inane total bullshit - but hey - seeing her getting pissed with ladies that had had SO much plastic surgery they make that 'cat' lady look tame was funny as fuck.















Anyroad,









Ruby






Ruby





Ruby





Ruby




Long Live the Kaiser Chiefs......................................

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

LMAO


A ducks walks into a bar and asks, "Got any grapes?" The bartender, confused, tells the ducks that no, his bar doesn't serve grapes. The duck thanks him and leaves.


The next day, the duck returns and says, "Got any grapes?" Again, the bartender tells him that, no, the bar does not serve grapes, has never served grapes, and, furthermore, will never serve grapes. The duck, a little ruffled, thanks him and leaves.


The next day, the duck returns, but before he can say anything, the bartender begins to yell: ''Listen, duck! This is a bar! We do not serve fucking grapes! If you ever ask for grapes again, I will nail your stupid fucking webbed duck feet to the fucking floor!''


The duck is silent for a moment, and then asks, ''Got any nails?''


A very pissed off bartenders replies “No I do not have any fucking nails!!!!”


''Got any grapes?''

Thursday, June 28, 2007

When I Grow up I want to be a Lebanese Girl

As many of you may be aware, I have always wanted to be a lebanese girl when I grow up. I love the way they wear the most fabulos shoes, I love the way the carry outrageous handbangs, and talk on their mobiles constantly. I love their dyed blonde hair, they are so fabulous in every sense of the word....





but now this





"The success of the industry in Lebanon last week prompted a Lebanese bank to put up billboards across the country to announce that they would be giving loans for plastic surgery.
The billboards are posted all over the capital, even in Beirut’s southern suburbs, a hotbed of the Islamist Hezbollah movement.
First National Bank’s “Plastic Surgery Loan” can provide between 1,000 and 5,000 dollars to cover “all your plastic surgery operations,” according to the bank’s website"





Oh dear lord.





New Boobs all round!





This is a much better image and part of the reason I love them....





Style in the face of adversity

(now I know this sounds ill informed and trite, but ......)

Monday, June 25, 2007

Glasters Eat Your Heart Out


Galstonbury on the weekend just gone. The Kaiser Chiefs played second headliner to THE WHO! to 177000 people ( or there abouts ) Bad Glastonbury story and a good glastonbury story


but the thing is, that we are going to Splendour, where we get to see them, and Lily Allen, and the Artic Monkeys, and The Cat Empire and the Hilltop Hoods.


And as Cool as that is, it is not quite as cool as the gumboots we have procured to wear.


They look like this.....................
I know I know.
We LOVE!



Friday, June 22, 2007

Monkey Magic Intro

This is truly truly great.

How to cheer up your Friday afternoon

Thursday, June 21, 2007

And of Course this too

have a look at what we are doing here at uni, for our school leavers

click click click click

it could of course go terribly wrong but that is the excitement of it.

And I love youTube anyway - now I feel like it is DeGrassi Junior High for Toowoomba.

See, I told you it was cold


Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Holy God its Cold

I know its not Victorian weather but you try waking up in a big old queenslander with no heating on a day like today.......

Friday, June 15, 2007

I think I want to move to Melbourne

As much as I love the Queensland weather (and I am excluding Tba from that statement), I really really want to be able to sit in a cool coffee shop/bar/pub, which is warm as warm compared to outside, browse newspapers, smoke fags (until end of June anyway) and look out across a windy street at all the cool, hip young things on their way to meet other cool hip young things and solve the problems of the world.

Here there is one quasi cool cafe, and very few cool hip young things.Clothing here in Tba town still revolves around RM Williams, Ralph Lauren and Myer. Culture and Fashion - why have you forsaken me?

In the immortal words of MSKP "I wish you would all stop mucking around and just move to Melbourne." and today I feel like doing just that.


Can you guarantee it will be warm in September?

Perhaps I should just move for the winter...................

Any road, all the blogging out there and the cool pictures make me want to move.

Maybe I need a minibreak in Brisbane.

(and horror of horrors, it is Grammar Day this weekend - god save us all)

Tba fashion for boys Tba fashion for girls

Thursday, May 24, 2007

He's Gone Gone Gone (and Crying won't bring him back)

Well,

as all of my getting chucked goes. sometimes I need to vent publicly to get over it.

The young boy is gorn. Thats what you get for sticking your doodle in someone else.

So me and Lily Allen are giving it a red hot go.

Enjoy one and all.

(apparently I can't put the tune in here. Curses. You know what I mean anyway)

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

And in News Just in.........I've got your nose

On a brighter note,

If you ever need a laugh you should read the Toowoomba Chronicle it is truly entertaining.

Recently it was featured on Media Watch for its top quality journalism

You'll have to wait to see who gets featured again after the "evacuating SE Qld Towns due to lack of water" fiasco.

Love!!

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Morally Reprehensible

I am currently experiencing a bit of a ‘moment’ – you know what ever the diametric opposite of an epiphany is.

I got chucked – which is fine. This is not the morally reprehensible situation. The boy I was kissing is very young – and his family was not, shall we say, so happy about the situation. But nevertheless we persevered for nigh on two years.

During this time, I apparently represented the embodiment of pure evil. Now, I have yet to work out just how supporting him emotionally, physically and financially is evil. Or how apologising to all and sundry for his behaviour (generally influenced by illicit substances), or cleaning up after him, finding him a FANTASTIC job, ignoring his foibles, taking him back after drunken rages, and indiscretions could be conceived as evil but – there you have it. EVIL.

Now, during my time within that family I observed some things that could only be described as morally questionable. Relationships conducting whilst the other was still attached, character assassination, underhanded dealings, comments made regarding peoples political persuasion to the detriment of said persons social, political and career standings……………

All very interesting. But none of those behaviours did they see as being evil. Not even a little bit.

Strange.

Which leads me to the next situation.

I have since discovered that the ex boy has been sleeping with his ex girlfriend. In his sisters (my old friends) house. And not only that, the majority of my (our) friendship group knew about it, along with his family. Oh, before he chucked me.

And just decided not to tell me.

So now on two levels I am confused as to what constitutes behaviour that is morally reprehensible.

So apparently I am simply evil – but his behaviour – totally acceptable and the rest of them, well…………………

I thought I would do some research into morality. And apparently the way I have been conducting myself – you know, give out the love, understanding, compassion, turn the other cheek, lets try and make it the best we can – on a different moral level to “If we don’t tell her, it won’t matter and we won’t get in trouble. What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her”.

Have a look here - Morals? What Morals!

And confusion reigns. I really don’t know who to be angry with. His behaviour is not actually that out of character, and I can accept it (morals?), but the behaviour of his family (my friend???) I do not understand. And the rest of the friendship group – I mean really what is that? (One boy actually said –“I thought he was bullshitting me and by the time I found out it was true – well I just decided not to tell you. Did not want to rock the boat.” I am fairly sure that that was a justification of his behaviour for him, and not to help me).

And so to morally reprehensible.


There are things that I do not think are morally offensive that many others would

For example

Taking A class drugs – or any drug for that matter – as long as you are not in control of a vehicle or responsible for small children. After all you are only hurting yourself.

Pornography – hey – I am not saying that all porn is made under circumstances that are conducive to give out the love – but a few dirty stories? Who is that hurting? (an I am going to include any sort of “marital aid” here as well)

Getting drunk in the middle of the day – again with the levels of responsibility and hurting only yourself.

Standing up your beliefs – as long as you have information to back it up.

Whereas things I do find reprehensible (which obviously many do not)

Lying – in any form – especially to protect yourself

Acting with complete disregard of others feelings

Cheating – pretty sure that this one needs no explanation.

Fake justification – don’t say things to make you feel better under the guise of explaining to me or trying to make me feel better.

Lying by omission (can you tell this is one that REALLY winds me up)

Expecting everyone else to carry you and look after you. Stand up for yourself.

Treating people as less than yourself – come on NO ONE is that good.

Casting dispersions on peoples abilities simply because you do not agree with their point of view/sexual orientation/ age group/ choice of shoes.

So world,

Discuss


(I am worried I am over the whole thing and may just have to go and live in a convent for non religious types and carry on my good deeds without having to actually interact with anyone. Ever. Well maybe the postman – a nun can have good shoes can’t she???)

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

As God is My Witness, I will never be Hungry Again

When I was about 7 I saw Gone with the Wind for the first time.

They played it on 10 4 5a and me and my Grandma sat up and watched it. Her for the costumes and the memories and me to be with her.

I LOVED it. My cousin Natalie watched it too.

Then I discovered aged about 11, that my Grandfather had a copy of the book - a first Australian Edition that was handed to him, no doubt by one of his sisters.

So I read it. And LOVED it even more than the film.

But the really really weird thing was, I always wanted to be Melanie - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Melanie_Wilkes.

Good Girl Melanie, with the kind love of the Slow eyed Ashley, the one everyone loved, with the one little boy Wade Hampton that everyone doted over, with no need for money, with a house full of books and music.

Always wanted to be her.

Unfortunately I am Scarlett O'Hara. Wild, willful, dark haired, brash, opinionated Scarlett. The Scarlett woman Scarlett. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scarlett_o%27hara

Which is, now I am so not 11, probably the best choice. But I always wanted to be Melanie.

Which is where the whole idea of the Proverbs 31 Girls frighten the absolute bejesus out of me.

Hack talk about it here - http://abc.net.au/jtv/video/default.htm?clip=hillsong

And here is a sermon given in america - .http://www.visionforumministries.org/issues/family/a_special_word_for_proverbs_31.aspx

Worrying.

Learning Learning all the Time

My lovely friend Andrew is doing his last course to complete his degree. He has chosen a very cool course to do and it is going to make dinner parties and the pub so much more interesting.

The name of the course is America and the Great Powers in International Politics, through Deakin Uni...

You can find ou about the actual course http://www.deakin.edu.au/courses/search/course.php?customer_cd=D&unit_cd=AIR245&year_offered=2007& (sorry about the long link but my little link button is not working today!)

He has the choice of three questions:

1. How important are great powers in the international system? Discuss with reference to political, military and economic issues;
2. Is a unipolar international system with a single greatest power stable over the long term; or 3. Is the United Nations merely a tool of great powers such as the US? What sort of evidence should we look for in answering this question?

And I have sent him to number three - because there is LOADS of evidence to prove that the US, UK and EU are not exactly enamoured with the UN.

Can you (blogland) give us a hand in finding some more info and maybe even starring in the assignment - if you are prepared to be quoted - so Andrew can kick arse in this very cool subject?

Well............................... Can you?

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Ghosts of Good Times Past

Places to never go if you don't want to see anyone you ever really liked and then got fucked over by.....

1. The Spotted Cow in Toowoomba - as an aside you should never want to go here anytime, much better to just end up there so you can cast derisive glances to all and sundry, whinge and then leave - all within about 30 mins.

2. Oxford Street in London - I always managed to run into someone I knew there.... but I nearly forgive this one for the great shops ( H & M rules)

3. The Bar in the Sofitel in Melbourne.


Fuckers.

Friday, March 02, 2007

Standing on the Outside

There is a Cold Chisel Tribute Album on its way.....

I just won a copy just by posting on their site.

Cool as.

And I crashed my car. Plop.

ch ch ch ch ch ch check it out......... here (and yes I know that is the Beastie Boys and not Chisel but it is cool anyway!)

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Birthdays, Hottegories and Yellow

It was my sisters birthday yesterday - she is very cool and very nice and helps me alot.

It is my friend Ejays birthday soon - she is also lovely and kind and helpful.

It is my bosses birthday today.


It is not, unfortunately - my birthday.

But more than birthdays I also have my lovely friend Andrews leaving event.

He has opted out of the Tba Lifestyle - in favour of Albury. For those uninitiated in either of these towns learn more at this site for Tba and this one for Albury - much of a muchness you may proclaim! This may seem true but a house in Arthur st is much much closer that one in Albury - hence the going away party.

I have been informed that our venue of choice is havign a theme night that night - and as you may have realised from Andrews appearance in the photo down there


he doesn't mind dressing up.......

but more to the point - I will miss him terribly. He was one of my customers from my short lived time as a service advisor at Holden - he was funny and cute and willing to banter with me, and I decided I wanted him as a friend. So many drunken nights and hungover afternoons later I can do nothing but wish him the best,

*sigh*



*sniff*



*reaches for conviently placed hanky to wipe away tears*


who needs that sentimental bullshit anyway?

On to the topic at hand. Kazzle Bedazzle is playing hottegories on her blog - too fun. Unfortunately my creativeness has deserted me today - so I cannot play. But be my guest (well hers actually - because it is her blog)
On the way back from Fraser Coast yesterday I was challanged with naming seven large yellow things after a grader was hampering our progress back to Tba.

So I named 7 large yellow things then it was mooted that large yellow was too limiting - so then it was just generally yellow things. Now I dont' know if you have ever noticed - but just do it now - look around for yellow things.............................................





aren't there alot!!!




And you never even noticed before!!!!!!!

Too cool


So here are some more yellow things for you to look at









Tootle Pip!















Friday, February 16, 2007

Cool, Clear, Water

This is about water......

of course living in Tba we talk about water ALL the time.

and so I love this whole idea. But I have a controversial question for the world.

I believe that clean water is a basic human right. And when your man sank the first bore in 1878 he made such a huge difference to the Australian countryside and to life in general - that is not under contention but..... and I quote

"Hundreds of bores have been sunk into the GAB since the first in 1878 near Bourke in New South Wales. By 1915, there were 1500 bores and a peak flow of 2000 megalitres a day. Over the decades as more and more bores were sunk, water pressure and flow rates dropped across much of the GAB.
Much of the water that is extracted is wasted. It is estimated that up to 80 per cent of the total outflow from the GAB is wasted because of inefficient water delivery systems. Thousands of kilometres of open drains dug across properties to water animals lose water to evaporation and seepage. "

So although I love this idea and it NEEDS to be happening,

do we have a responsibility to inform of what may happen.......

can we help with this as well perhaps.

In less than 100 years we were using this precious gift to irrigate crops that are not native and could not survive without this water, to sell and export. Clean, sweet water flung out over acres and acres of land.....

What do you think?